30 before 30 - september update

I didn't accomplish a whole lot this month. In fact I don't think I have a single thing to cross off. However, I did complete some of the ongoing things such as reading and completing some of my unfinished tasks.

1. Write A Letter To The Editor

2. Learn Spanish
I am finished with the first section of Duolingo. I'm still learning a lot of new stuff but I have a ways to go.

3. Donate Blood

I am waiting for the next blood drive at work. Seems like an easy way to knock this one out.

4. Weigh Under 200

5. Go White Water Rafting

6. Go To A Hockey Game

7. Visit Portland

8. Run A 1/2 Marathon

9. Learn The Thriller Dance

10. Take A Dance Class With Sandra

11. Start A Fire

I found a couple of different ways to start a fire without matches or a lighter. One is with steel wool and a battery and the other is the bow drill method. I'm going to do both, hopefully in the next few weeks.

12. Go To The Top Of The Space Needle

13. Go To A Comedy Show
I bought tickets to Louis C.K. but it's not until December.

14. Go Backpack Camping

15. Walk Across The Tacoma Narrows Bridge

16. Ask 10 People Their Favorite Book And Read Them
I finally finished reading other random books so I'm starting on this one some time this week. Just gotta figure out which book to start with.

17. Paint A Picture

18. Attend A Midnight Premiere Of A Movie

19. Read 10 Books To My Kids
The Hobbit
Harriet the Spy - Starting this one this week. Shouldn't take very long.
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
Charlie and the Clocolate Factory
The Phantom Tollbooth
Holes
The Invention of Hugo Cabret
The Watsons Go to Birmingham
Number the Stars
The Golden Compass

20. Go To A Seahawks Training Camp Practice

21. Eat At A Top Rated Restaurant

22. Watch The Top 50 Movies on IMDB
I didn't watch a whole lot of movies this month. Most of my movie watching time was spent watching season 6 of Dexter. The movie quality is getting better, and I'm starting to rewatch some good ones that I had already seen. Best movie I watched this month - American History X.

23. Go On A 5 Day Fast

24. Make Something With Homegrown Food

25. Go To Canada

26. Finish My Unfinished Tasks At Home

I rearranged the kitchen a little (moved the fridge and a cabinet), rerouted the light switch, painted the light and walls, cleaned some of the attic, and painted the laundry area.

27. Read The Bible

28. Volunteer At A Homeless Shelter

29. Complete A Mud Run

30. Bet On The Superbowl Winner Before The Season Starts
This might end up being the most difficult task to complete. Apparently in Washington State you can't gamble online. I tried signing up for a few different websites, but since I am a Washington resident I couldn't. I might have to go to Vegas or have someone place a bet for me, but unfortunately it will have to wait until next year.

stumble upon stuff

Nothing is better for dealing with boredom on the Internet than StumbleUpon. For those who haven't had the pleasure of experiencing it's greatness, it is just like the Pandora music program (hopefully you know what that is) but for websites. You fill out a little checklist of your interests and voila, it will start finding websites that you should be interested in. If it starts giving you stupid websites you aren't interested in, just give them a thumbs down and it will stop showing similar websites. There is also a mobile app....so download it. Here are 9 random websites I like that I found using StumbleUpon.

86 Booze Rules

Magical Glowing Cocktails

25 Phrases You Wish You Could Say At Work More Often

Old Spice Music

Bald-Hairy

Robot Drummer

Basketball Player Impersonator

Bubble Guy

Funny Signs

six songs of me

I found a website called Six Songs Of Me and thought I'd share my six songs as well as some explanation for each of them.

1. What was the first song you ever bought?

This one is a little weird because you don't really buy individual songs so I'll put the album. I remember having music in the early 90's but I'm pretty sure someone else bought it for me. This is the first CD I can think of that I actually bought myself was Incesticide by Nirvana which I got to keep me occupied during a car trip to California. Crap, the question says song.....um, I guess I'll just go with the first song on the CD, Dive.

2. What Song Always Gets You Dancing?

The only time I have ever danced is when I'm too drunk to care that I'm making a fool of myself, so to answer this one I consulted with someone who has witnessed most of my sweet moves, my wife Sandra. ......Unfortunately she was of no help. I guess I'd say the music that most makes me want to dance is drum and bass music. As for a specific song, I'd say Messiah by Konflict. It is the first track on Dieselboy's The 6ixth Session. Any song that can cause a metal band to switch genres and start making drum and bass music (Pendulum) has got to be worth dancing to, right?

3. What Song Brings You Back To Your Childhood?

I like this question. There are a lot ways I can go with this because different songs bring me back to different times of my childhood and the people in it. It seems like any person or time of your life (at least for me) can be described with music. Old school country (or whatever it's called) reminds me of breakfast at my grandma's house when I was little. Oldies remind me of riding to school with the LaBerge's in 5th grade, soul music reminds me of hanging out with my dad, grunge music reminds me of when MTV actually played music, and the list goes on. If I had to pick just one song though that brings me back to my childhood, I'd have to go with Jump by Kris Kross. I can't wait for the backwards overall fad to come back!

4. What Is Your Perfect Love Song?

This is a girl question and I don't really want to answer it. I guess I have to put something here, how about Kiss You All Over by Exile. It's a good thing Adam Sandler makes sure people don't forget about all of that awesome 80's music.

5. What Song Would You Want At Your Funeral?

What better than to Rick Roll everyone at your own funeral? Funerals should be a celebration of someone's life so a funeral song shouldn't be sad, depressing, Coldplay style music. I wouldn't want my funeral song to remind people of my death, I'd rather have it make them smile. That's why I would pick Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley.

6. Time For The Encore. One Last Song That Makes You, You.

This one has to be Teach Me How To Dougie by Cali Swag District. Did you expect anything else? I'm pretty sure this song/dance was made just for me. There are two great things about this song. First, who else has a cartoon AND a song/dance named after them? And second, whenever masterpieces like this are made you get the laugh at all of the YouTube weirdos that need to share their skills with the world.

ten things i think i think

1. Although he wasn't known for talking, I think this Charlie Chaplin speech is pretty great. Also I think it is sad to hear speeches like this that still apply after all those years.



2. I think these are some things that sports analysts/announcers say that I hate:

Intestinal fortitude - when used in reference to someone having "guts". It just sounds stupid.

We are going have to out score them to win (or other variations) - when used in reference to a high scoring game. Thank you Captain Obvious.

110% - when used in reference to the amount of effort given. This pisses me off 110% of the time.

World Champions - when used for champions of leagues that do not exist internationally (NBA, NFL, etc). Is the rest of the world arrogant enough to call themselves "world champs" of anything without competing against other countries?

3. I think the link below is a good reminder that there is a world beyond America.

10 things American's don't know

4. I think this is an interesting stat (as of 8/10/12)

2012 Mariners average home attendance - 22,710 (MLB average - 31,414)
2012 Sounders average home attendance - 39,469 (MLS average - 18,732)
Just saying....

5. Little bit of randomocity. So I was reading an article disputing a market analysis for the Seattle area in reference to bringing the Sonics back (yeah I know, boring) and I saw a word that caught my eye....embiggen. I knew I had heard this word before but I couldn't remember where. Turns out it is not actually a real word but it was mentioned in an episode of The Simpsons. Why do I remember things like this but I can't remember to take the garbage out to the curb?

6. I think these are a few random quotes I like:

"Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple."
-Barry Switzer

"May the best day of your past be the worst day of your future".
-Unknown

"Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he can rob the world".
-Bob Wehadababyitsaboy....no, I don't know the author of this one either.

7. I think people should not be allowed to eat seafood for lunch at work when other people are in the office. If this smell was actually appealing, there would be air fresheners made out of it.

8. I think kids are funny. Here are 3 things that my daughter did the other day that made me laugh:

First she was singing the usual daily impromptu song that makes no sense whatsoever when she decided part of the lyrics should include spelling out the word "stupid". The only problem, other than being kinda weird, was that she spelled it "s-t-u-p-e-d". I told her she might want to keep that song to herself.

Later the kids were playing in Alyssa's room when she found a pair of oversized green glasses that were from St. Patrick's Day. Since the glasses were more than 5 minutes old, obviously they were broken (the lenses were missing). Aidan asked why there were no lenses and Alyssa said "Some people don't have lenses because they can't afford them". She is catching on to our attempts to make her more mindful of the hardships that some people face.....but why the hell would someone buy glasses with no lenses?

Lastly, my kids love taking pictures and videos for no apparent reason. Alyssa managed to no only capture this gem of a picture but also post it on Sandra's Facebook with an accompanying comment of "Crazy Laddy[sic]". I'm not sure how kids learn how to do this stuff at such an early age, but it's pretty funny.

9. I think puzzles like this are great. Maybe it's nerdy, I don't know, but I hope they still have kids do stuff like this at school. I've heard about tests like this being used for job interviews. Here are some examples:

http://hunternuttall.com/
http://www.kent.ac.uk
http://www.knowledgebase-script.com

10. I think basketball in the Olympics needs to be a U23 tournament. I get no joy out of watching the USA destroy every other country. Some people will point to the close championship game with Spain and try and say the rest of the world can compete with us. I say that the lack of a center due to injuries is the only reason that game wasn't a 30 point blowout....The Gasol brothers looked like beasts and Pau is only the 4th best player on the Lakers. The US rarely is able to put their best team on the court due to injuries, players not wanting to risk injuries, or contract issues, yet still destroys every other country. The team of injured guys that missed the Olympics (Wade, Rose, Howard, Bosh, Griffin, Aldridge, Billups) would still probably beat most countries except maybe Spain and Argentina when healthy. I don't think the disaster of 2004 will happen again simply because American players now know that losing is possible, but winning a game.....not a preliminary game, but an actual this-one-counts, win-or-go-home game by a score of 156-73 is nothing to be proud of in my opinion.

my nfl playoff predictions

It's less than a month away from the start of the NFL and I am feeling a lot like Bart Scott getting ready to play the Steelers....I CAN'T WAIT!!! There are few things in life that get me as excited as football. That excitement has led me to making my first (and probably last) "doug's official nfl playoff prediction". I tried finding a way to make a fancy, easy to read version of this but I suck with Excel and couldn't get the stupid file to embed correctly and I just gave up.

In case there is any confusion in the picture below, here are my pick in order of playoff seeds. AFC - New England (13-3), Baltimore (11-5), San Diego (9-7), Tennessee (9-7)(Division Winners), Buffalo (9-7) and Denver (8-8)(Wild Cards). NFC - Philadelphia (12-4), Green Bay (11-5), Seattle (10-6), Atlanta (11-5)(Division Winners), Dallas (10-6) and Chicago (9-7)(Wild Cards). Yes I know the Saints, Steelers, Texans, Lions, Giants and 49ers are not in there. And yes I know a 3 seed for Seattle seems a bit high. There are a lot of good teams in the NFC so I think there might be some surprises due to good teams with tough schedules getting left out.

So why the Bears and Ravens? People have been saying it for awhile, but I think Joe Flacco is ready for a breakout season. Ray Rice is the best RB in the NFL in my opinion, and they were a pathetic dropped TD away from being in the Superbowl last year. I think their offensive improvements (and hopefully Cam Cameron's play calling) will make up for the loss of Terrell Suggs and Ray Lewis and Ed Reed will carry the defense once again, knowing it may be their last shot at a Super Bowl. They might even get the Jerome Bettis treatment from a few years ago.

As far as Chicago goes, to me they remind me a lot of the Giants. They aren't the most consistent but I think they will come through when it counts. In my opinion Brandon Marshall was the best acquisition any team made this offseason and I've always been a big Cutler fan. He has been able to put up numbers with average WR's and below average OL. If they give him any kind of time, I expect a big season from him.

So who does everyone else have winning it all this year?



click to embiggen

30 before 30 - August Update

July was a busy month but I managed to get a few things on my list accomplished. I don't think I'll have any time the rest of this summer for any outdoor items so hopefully it stays warm for a few months or I'll be waiting until next summer.

1. Write A Letter To The Editor

2. Learn Spanish
I am almost done with the first section of Duolingo. I think I'm well on my way to being able to speak basic sentences.

3. Donate Blood

4. Weigh Under 200

5. Go White Water Rafting

6. Go To A Hockey Game

7. Visit Portland

8. Run A 1/2 Marathon

9. Learn The Thriller Dance

10. Take A Dance Class With Sandra

11. Start A Fire

12. Go To The Top Of The Space Needle

13. Go To A Comedy Show
I bought tickets to Louis C.K. but it's not until December.

14. Go Backpack Camping

15. Walk Across The Tacoma Narrows Bridge
This was a lot of fun and the kids actually enjoyed it also. There isn't really any parking near the bridge but we found a spot nearby with 3 spots you can park at on the side of the road. If I get ambitious I'll post some pictures.

16. Ask 10 People Their Favorite Book And Read Them
I posted a question on FB awhile ago asking for book suggestions. I have one more to read and then I'll start these.

17. Paint A Picture

18. Attend A Midnight Premiere Of A Movie
I saw the Dark Knight Rises. Wasn't as good as I was hoping for but going at midnight definitely made it more entertaining. I went to the new Bremerton theater for the first time. The theater received a messed up copy of the movie which caused the audio to sound like stuttering for the last 30 minutes. It sounds annoying but it was actually kinda funny (it might have been more upsetting if the movie was better....or maybe I was jst laughing because it was 2:30 in the morning). Anyways, we got free movie tickets out of it so it was worth it.

19. Read 10 Books To My Kids
The Hobbit - 2 more chapters! I hope the other books are shorter
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
Harriet the Spy
Charlie and the Clocolate Factory
The Phantom Tollbooth
Holes
The Invention of Hugo Cabret
The Watsons Go to Birmingham
Number the Stars
The Golden Compass

20. Go To A Seahawks Training Camp Practice
This was a lot cooler than I thought it would be. The only downer was that I went to the first practice and they weren't wearing pads yet, so there wasn't any tackling or anything. Also it would have been cool to see Terrell Owens. There were activities for the kids to do and we got an autographed Sea Gals calendar. We had to leave a little early so we couldn't stick around for player autographs but I'm definitely going back next year so maybe I'll get some then.

21. Eat At A Top Rated Restaurant

22. Watch The Top 50 Movies on IMDB
I have watched about 20 of them now. It's weird how many quotes or conversations I've heard that relate to things in the older movies I watched. I would have been clueless had I not watched them. Best movie I watched this month - North by Northwest.

23. Go On A 5 Day Fast

24. Make Something With Homegrown Food

25. Go To Canada

26. Finish My Unfinished Tasks At Home

27. Read The Bible

28. Volunteer At A Homeless Shelter

29. Complete A Mud Run

30. Bet On The Superbowl Winner Before The Season Starts
I haven't made my bet yet but unless I change my mind I'm going with the Baltimore Ravens.

guns don't kill people, fear kills people

First let me explain my background with guns. I do not own nor have I ever owned a gun. I do not hunt nor do I have a desire to go to a shooting range. Firing a weapon that is designed to kill is just not something my brain has decided is necessary, especially since I have 2 young children. However, I do not condone anyone for owning a gun. I do think there are a few good reasons to own a gun....just do not count self defense, protection or "fear" amongst them.

We live in a country that is consumed by fear. Americans seem to be afraid of anyything they are told is a potential risk whether it's the fear of not having a gun, the fear of Y2K, or the fear of Universal Health Care. There is virtually no evidence to suggest that there could be a repeat of the attacks in Aurora, Colorado yet there was an increase of more than 40% in Colorado residents registering to purchase guns....all because of fear. Americans have good reasons to be afraid of everything, just watch the news. The news is mainly comprised of reasons not to go outside (murderers, rapists, bank robbers, etc..) with some weather (which is usually another reason not to leave the house) and some sports sprinkled in at the end.

It is unfortunate that the only time guns get any attention is when one of these crazy mass murder situations occurs. Then we get to hear a thousand people explain why we need more gun control and 1000 people defending the right to bear arms.....only the end result is we always do nothing. I'm not going to try and argue one side or another but what I will say is that it is ridiculous that a person is able to purchase 6,000 rounds of ammunition and semi-automatic weapons as easily as the Aurora killer did. People on both sides of the gun debate should agree with that. There will always be access to weapons for those who are hell bent on killing others, but I have a hard time believing that regulating the types of weapons, amount of weapons, and amount of ammunition one can purchase along with stricter penalties for violators of gun laws wouldn't have some kind of effect on the roughly 30,000 Americans that die each year from guns. To do nothing about it is to be acceptant of every gun related injury/death in America. Furthermore it is a slap in the face of every victim of Columbine, Virginia Tech, Aurora and every other unnecessary gun related incident.

If the sad tragedy in Aurora has one upside (if you want to call it that) it's that people are at least talking about the gun problems in America. I'd like to see more regulations but more importantly I'd like to see the government/independent studies/college students/anyone take a look at why Americans live in fear and how we can reduce it. Michael Moore is kind of a weirdo, but read his article on the gun debate. He makes a lot of good points, and also addresses the fear factor that people have today. People are always going to kill others but it's the fear that is created when one person kills another, the feeling of "what if this were me" which continues to prevent us from doing anything about it.

I'm not sure what the answer is but at some point we are going to have to figure it out.

offensive comedy

Recently comedian Daniel Tosh was criticized for "crossing the line" when he singled out an audience member while making a joke about rape. Daniel Tosh is a comedian, like many others, whose fame came as a direct result of his crude style of humor. Honestly, what was this lady expecting when she went to the show in the first place? She undoubtedly already knew who Daniel Tosh was prior to going to the show; therefore, she should have known what kind of humor to expect from him. My guess is that she went to the show expecting to laugh at offensive jokes.....as long as they were about other people.

The ability to offend all people equally is what has enabled people like Daniel Tosh, Dave Chappelle, the creators of South Park, and many others to become famous. Obviously rape is not a funny topic in conversation. Neither are wars, but we joke about them. Neither is child molestation, but we joke about it. Neither is starvation, AIDS, retardation, sexuality, or skin color, yet we joke about all of those. Why? Because jokes are not conversations and do not show a persons true feelings or opinions. Jokes are not meant to offend people, they are meant to make people laugh.

Not everyone finds the same things amusing, which is both obvious and understandable. But to laugh when the joke is aimed at others, and then complain when it is directed at you is ridiculous. It's also ridiculous to claim that certain topics should be off limits to comedians. Here is an idea for people that don't like certain types of jokes......find something else to do! In honor of the stupid lady that paid money to see a certain type of comedy, yet was shocked when she got it, here are some offensive jokes that maybe shouldn't be funny but make me laugh.

Q: How does every black joke start?
A: By looking over your shoulder.

An elementary school teacher, a lawyer, a Catholic priest and three young boys are on a plane with only three parachutes. Engines explode, plane starts going down. The teacher says, 'Save the children!' The lawyer yells, 'SCREW THE CHILDREN!!' The Catholic priest looks around and whispers, 'Is there time?'

Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?
A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

Q: What is Helen Keller’s favorite color?
A: Velcro.

Q: Whats a Jew's worst dilemma?
A: Free Ham.

Q: Whats the hardest part about rollerblading?
A: Telling your dad you're gay.

I locked my keys in my car outside of an abortion clinic the other night. It turns out they get really pissed when you go in and ask them for a coat hanger.

Q: Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
A: Because everyone who can run, jump and swim is already in the U.S.

Rape is no laughing matter....unless you're raping a clown.

Q: What do you call a black guy flying an airplane?
A: The pilot, you racist bastard.

Q: What do Japanese men do when they have an erection?
A: Vote

(Notice the lack of white jokes? Me too....turns out there aren't many. But I did find a website called White Guy Jokes dedicated to them. No individual joke is funny on it's own but together they are pretty funny.....even if they are basically making fun of everyone except for white people.)

ten things i think i think

1. I think this Grantland article is good reading for any bored sports fan. It's basically a rambling conversation with several different important sports topics but the cool part is that I basically agree with everything that is said. From comparing Tiger & LeBron to Britney Spears & Lindsey Lohan to wondering how Jordan would handle the social media attention of sports figures today or predicting the effects of the Concussion Era of the NFL, this story is interesting....at least to me.

2. I think I can't remember where I found this (see below)...but it sounds about right.

"Here's my entirely charming analysis of the whole Democrat vs. Republican debate: Imagine if you will a clogged toilet. The person that clogged it walks out of the bathroom embarrassedly and leaves. The Democrat and Republican both have to defecate and see the clogged toilet. The Democrat's solution is to buy a new clog-proof toilet and hire a plumber from across the country to put it in. Sure it'll cost a lot but we'll get a new toilet that won't clog and that plumber and the toilet manufacturers get paid. The Republican's solution is to simply continue using the toilet until it's too full to sit on, because at that point he'll just use someone else's toilet, probably China's, and let someone else deal with the mess. What we need is for someone to go in there and snake the drain, but nobody's willing to get their hands dirty."

3. I think Giving Keys would make nice gifts for Christmas/Chanukah/Kwanzaa (do you get gifts for Kwanzaa?). It seems like a cool concept....another one of those "Pay It Forward" type of things that seem to be popping up everywhere.

4. I think this is probably the first time you have ever seen Super Moonwalking!!! This should replace all of the stupid equestrian events at the Summer Olympics. I mean the horse is the freaking athlete and what does it get? No medal, no Wheaties box, no fame....only alfalfa....or whatever it is that horses eat. Even the alfalfa is dependent on not breaking a leg on a hurdle and being euthanized. But anyways, Super Moonwalking!! I can't wait until I see someone doing this in Seattle.



5. I think this is an interesting quote: “If my step-dad didn’t treat me like his son, I wouldn't have had any father at all.”

Some guy said this at work the other day and I guess I just never really thought about it before. He was talking about how single people in their 30's are always looking for a relationship with someone who doesn't already have kids and why he thinks it is stupid. What I think he was getting at is that there are tons of deadbeat dads out there, leaving tons of kids without father figures in their lives. If the mothers of those children are having a hard time with relationships because they have children, it is those children that suffer the most.

6. I think this is my new favorite music video. This video has it all; bikinis, super soakers, booty rockin everywhere....and the hottest pool party since Jagged Edge asked Where The Party At?. I'm pretty sure this kid is the son of Reggie from The Nutty Professor (see hair at 1:17 mark). Joking aside, I feel bad for the future of this poor kid.



7. I. Think. It. Is. Funny. How. Stupid. Things. Become. Trendy. For. No. Apparent. Reason. At. All.

8. I think this is the most embarrassing/sad/pathetic baseball quotes ever but is a great example of why I am a Red Sox fan. The quote was following a Mariner's 13 inning loss to the A's in which Felix Hernandez got yet another no decision after only allowing one first inning run over 7+ innings. It's also a good example of why celebrating the amount of wins a player has, in any sport, is dumb. It's completely out of an individuals control in a team game, regardless of talent.

"I knew once they scored a run I couldn't give up another one or I might lose the game in the first inning." - Felix Hernandez

9. I think I wrote a bunch of crap about this TED Talk yesterday but apparently forgot to save it. I also think I'm too lazy to explain/re-remember what I wrote before so I'm not going to. But here's the video.



10. I think trying to learn Spanish is confusing. It would be a lot easier to have someone fluent in Spanish be able to explain certain rules to me so I'm not trying to memorize so much but overall it is going pretty good. It's funny that my son is able to tell me specific words or correct my bad conjugations or incorrect pluralizations. Anyone wanting to learn a language FREE, here is another Duolingo shoutout. I only go on there for maybe an hour a week but I am already learning a lot....seems like a pretty good program.

yesterdayeth

I arose to warm cloudless skies at the usual 5:45 and prepared myself for the many tasks of the day. A hot shower, brushing of teeth, and donning of the days garments commenced. This was followed by an early departure from the warm comfort of my castle. See, neither my breakfast nor my middays meal were prepared prior to departure, so a stop at the local Safeway was in order. A bran muffin and cobb salad were purchased and I was on my way to work.

I arrived at my place of employment to a half empty lot, no doubt due to abundant leave use caused by the midweek festivities. Work consisted of a fairly pleasant 8 hour day, the only coil being informed that my presence was required for 24 hours more during the weekend. After work I returned to my castle and informed my mistress of the change in my weekend plans. My information was met with unexpected ire.

Sandra: "We had plans for morrow. You were supposed to take the kids to Cody's birthday breakfast in the morning and we have the Sounders game at 8."

Me: "This is true your most gracious majesty, but just last weekend thou spoke of me volunteering to work weekends, even if it conflicted with any conquests we may have had planned."

Sandra: "Aye, but we have tickets already for the game."

Me: "The game is at 8 and I will be off work by 6, no later. I checked the boat schedule and a 6:45 vessel is available which would allow me to make it to Seattle prior to commencement of the game. Plus I figured we could use the money earned this weekend to strengthen the walls that bound our land."

Sandra: "We can build a fence later my King. But whatever, let's go enjoy the Summer's air before the day is done."

With that we were off to the Field of Lions in East Bremcester. The bikes of our children were loaded in my coach, as the children and rode in the Queen's coach. We were greeted at the Field of Lions by the Maples clan. A few hours of soccer, bike riding, and feasting were followed by a planned trip to watch the Kitsap Pumas soccer game. The only problem was that I had not been gifted this knowledge. We packed up our belongings and left in our seperate coaches.

Shortly after my arrival back at my castle I was greeted by the remainder of my family. The smiling young faces of my children were a stark contrast to the rage that filled the face of my Queen.

Sandra: "Why did thou leavest the park so swiftly? We were trying to attract thine attention to make sure thou was headed to Bremcester Memorial Stadium for the Pumas game."

Me : "Expedience doth not depict my exit. I took two trips of stuff to thine coach, then walked over to my coach and put the bikes in the back before leaving. Besides, I thought we weren't going to the game."

Sandra: "No, thou ruttish fly-bitten knave, we agreed that we were to attend the game."

Me: "Your lips grow foul my sweetness. If the plan was agreed upon prior then wherefore the need for attracting my attention? Would I not have already been headed to Bremcester Stadium? Anyways, better three hours too late than a minute too soon."

Sandra: "Whatever, we can't going now. I'm going to taketh a bath."

Me: "All apologies my dearest Sandra, but men are men; the best sometimes forget. I shall instead go to the store and fetch food for our children's fish......and get some other crap. Fare thee well."

And so I traveled back to the withering lands of East Bremcester with 3 locations on my agenda, first being the pet store for more fish food. Upon locating the fish food I was met with more options than reasonably should be expected when buying betta food. As I reached for the first bottle a ghost appeared (there's always a bloody ghost) and said the following:

"Be careful of the food you choose,
or two more fish are yours to lose.
The future of your fish is bleak,
Lest worms of blood are what you seek."

So I grabbed some regular food and some blood worms, bought them, and then headed to Lowe's.

At Lowe's my trip consisted solely of scoping out new stairs to reach my castle's tower (attic ladders). After a quick examination I left Lowe's and headed for the most heinous, attrocious of all places, Wal-Mart. As usual, I was greeted with the expected wayward smile and squeaky cart for my goods. I gathered my required items in a timely manner in effort to reduce time spent in this bastard of a store. It was then that I was poisoned by an anger unmatched, born from totteringly long checkout lines.

Me: "Pray pardon me thou mountain of mad flesh, I demand these lines speed up at once."

Cashier: "Halt your tongue thou villainous whey-face and wait your turn".

Me: "You are a woman, and yet your beard forbids me to interpret that you are so. Nonetheless woman, I shall patiently grant your request."

And so after what seemed a fortnight I finally was able to complete my purchase and returned home to my family, already in their beds. I fed the fish and put away the goods I had bought. I then retired to my bedroom where my Queen was still lying awake.

Me: "Thou art my muse, inspiration for mine every breath and bringer of laughter and song unto mine heart, an angel fair gracing me with the divine light of the heavens. All days are nights to see till I see thee, and nights bright days when dreams do show thee me."

Sandra: "Shutup and go to sleep."

This was inspired by a book I recently finished titled Fool by Christopher Moore. It is basically a comedic twist on Shakespeare's King Lear, only from the perspective of the King's jester, Pocket (the Fool).

Just to make sure nobody ends up yelling at me for recommending this book, here is the author's description of it: "This is a bawdy tale. Herein you will find gratuitous shagging, murder, spanking, maiming, treason, and heretofore unexplored heights of vulgarity and profanity, as well as non-traditional grammar, split infinitives, and the odd wank. If that sort of thing bothers you, then gentle reader pass by, for we endeavor only to entertain, not to offend. That said, if that’s the sort of thing you think you might enjoy, then you have happened upon the perfect story!”

Consider thee duly warned.

30 before 30 - July update

1. Write A Letter To The Editor

2. Learn Spanish
I finally started using Duolingo and have already learned a lot. It's a FREE language learning program for anyone interested.

3. Donate Blood

4. Weigh Under 200

5. Go White Water Rafting

6. Go To A Hockey Game

7. Visit Portland

8. Run A 1/2 Marathon

9. Learn The Thriller Dance

10. Take A Dance Class With Sandra

11. Start A Fire

12. Go To The Top Of The Space Needle

13. Go To A Comedy Show
I bought tickets to Louis C.K. but it's not until December.

14. Go Backpack Camping

15. Walk Across The Tacoma Narrows Bridge
Had this one planned but it rained to I backed out. Should be going within the next few weeks though.

16. Ask 10 People Their Favorite Book And Read Them
I posted a question on FB awhile ago asking for book suggestions. I'm going to finish a few more of those and then get started on these 10.

17. Paint A Picture
I watched a spray paint artist named Joseph Francis (The Art Surgeon) in Seattle and I think that's the kind of painting I want to try out....not sure when though, but I like it because it's different. 18. Attend A Midnight Premiere Of A Movie
I'm thinking about checking out The Dark Knight Rises when it opens.

19. Read 10 Books To My Kids
The Hobbit (Still not done yet...ugh)
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
Harriet the Spy
Charlie and the Clocolate Factory
The Phantom Tollbooth
Holes
The Invention of Hugo Cabret
The Watsons Go to Birmingham
Number the Stars
The Golden Compass

20. Go To A Seahawks Training Camp Practice

21. Eat At A Top Rated Restaurant

22. Watch The Top 50 Movies on IMDB
I have watched the first 6 so far: Vertigo, M, The Shining, Taxi Driver, American Beauty, and Toy Story 3. I hadn't seen any of those before which makes sense since 4 were made before I was born. It's funny to see how movies have changes since then.

23. Go On A 5 Day Fast

24. Make Something With Homegrown Food

25. Go To Canada

26. Finish My Unfinished Tasks At Home

27. Read The Bible

28. Volunteer At A Homeless Shelter

29. Complete A Mud Run

30. Bet On The Superbowl Winner Before The Season Starts
I found a website Sportsbook.com that I can bet on the winner.

30 before 30

As I mentioned in a previous post I would be making a list of 30 things to do before I turn 30. Big thanks to Kirsten for the idea. After I looked into this a little I found out a lot of people actually make these lists. The only lame thing is that most of them are girls. Maybe guys are less ambitious or just more content with stuff. I don't know but I don't care, I'm doing it anyways.

I figure if I am going to make a list of things to do in the next year and 4 months, I better have some type of rules for each item to make sure I can actually complete my list.

Rule #1 - Must be realistic
I would love to go to Australia, but the cost and reality of doing that with a family of 4 make it pretty unrealistic.

Rule #2 - Must be within my control
Basically what I mean is that I could say something like "I want to watch the Seahawks win in the Superbowl" but I have no direct control over that, so it shouldn't be on my list.

Rule #3 - Must update my progress monthly
I think this is the most important one. I would hate to get to September next year and still have 20 things left to do, so I figure if I update my progress every month it will help keep me motivating on accomplishing things.

After months, days, a couple of hours of thinking and borrowing ideas from other lists here it is. The 30 things I will do before I turn 30.

1. Write A Letter To The Editor
I don't even care if it gets published; I just think it would be cool to write one. I like reading them and am surprised at some of the garbage that gets published. Surely I can make something halfway decent.

2. Learn Spanish
I think it is sad how few people in the US are fluent in another language. I learned basically 1 year of German and I know a few things in Spanish but that's it. I would like to at least be able to carry on simple conversations in Spanish. Good thing Duolingo is almost available!

3. Donate Blood
Believe it or not but I have never donated blood. I have to get my blood checked periodically for work and it makes me want to puke. Just the thought of someone taking my blood makes me nauseous. Nonetheless it's sad that I haven't given blood and plan to do so.

4. Weigh Under 200
This one might take a little while but it's something I need to do. I think I've been 200 or more since like high school but it will be cool to see if I can get below.

5. Go White Water Rafting
Something I've never done but always wanted to.

6. Go To A Hockey Game
I have absolutely no interest in hockey but I have heard from several people, also without interest in hockey, that the games are tons of fun.

7. Visit Portland
I don't know exactly why I have never been there. Maybe I did when I was young enough not to remember, who knows, but I have always thought it seemed like a cool city to visit.

8. Run A 1/2 Marathon
I thought about putting a full marathon here but I don't think I would do that. 13 miles is enough for me, especially since I've never even done an official 5k.

9. Learn The Thriller Dance
I know parts of it but I'd like to know the whole thing. I'm not much of a dancer but there's no way I wouldn't bust this out every year at Halloween.

10. Take A Dance Class With Sandra
Speaking of dancing and how I suck at it, I think it would be cool to take a dance class with my wife. I don't know which style...Salsa? Swing? Ballroom? The Cat Daddy? I guess it doesn't matter since I don't know anything about dancing but it's still a goal of mine.

11. Start A Fire
I don't mean in a fireplace or a bonfire, I mean starting a fire from scratch caveman style.

12. Go To The Top Of The Space Needle
I have lived in Washington for almost my entire life, an hour away from one of the coolest buildings in America and I have never gone to the top.

13. Go To A Comedy Show
Another weird thing I somehow have never done. I love comedy but have never seen it live. That has gotta change.

14. Go Backpack Camping
I like camping a lot but I am not really into the RV/State Park/power/electricity/showers/buying wood type of camping. To me it really takes away from what I think camping should be about. I'd like to go camping somewhere that you have to hike somewhere hauling in everything you will need.

15. Walk Across The Tacoma Narrows Bridge
When driving across it seems like a pretty cool view, only you are across before you can really appreciate it. If you are busy checking out the view then you are probably seconds away from an accident. I want to check it out without risking death.

16. Ask 10 People Their Favorite Book And Read Them
I recently started reading a little and really enjoyed the suggestions that I got from people on books. I have read an embarrassingly low number of books in my lifetime and am trying to change that.

17. Paint A Picture
Art is a strange thing that is largely just up to the interpretation of others. Some kids make art that is more interesting than famous artists. I sometimes hate how critical I am of everything and I think painting would be a good way for me to just not care and see what happens. Plus I can decorate my refrigerator with it.

18. Attend A Midnight Premiere Of A Movie
I don't even know why I want to do this but I do. I only go to the theaters about twice a year, but I'd like to join those crazy people that go to the first viewing at least one time if for no other reason than to say I did it. I'm thinking maybe The Dark Knight Rises or The Hobbit

19. Read 10 Books To My Kids
I guess I need to be more specific here. I made a list awhile back of 10 good books to read to children that are targeted for ages close to my kids. Aidan doesn't seem to have the attention span to sit through me reading but Alyssa likes it a lot. We have been reading The Hobbit and although it seems like it is taking forever, the kids really look forward to it.

20. Go To A Seahawks Training Camp Practice
Another random thing I always thought would be cool. I didn't even know they let people watch some of their practices until a few years ago and it only costs like a $5 bus ride from where you park to the practice field. They just take reservations on a first come basis, but hopefully this year or next I'll finally go.

21. Eat At A Top Rated Restaurant
I like food but I don't really care for fancy stuff usually. I guess I am just too picky of an eater. I would still like to go waste a bunch of money sometime on a meal at a fancy place.

22. Watch The Top 50 Movies on IMDB
There are a lot of movies on the IMDB to 250 that I have never seen. I honestly have no clue how some of them passed me by. Some were just made before my time. Anyways, I am going to watch/rewatch the top 50 starting at 50 and working my way up.

23. Go On A 5 Day Fast
This one is just something I am curious if I could actually do. I know there are certain rules to fasting and I'm going to figure them out and try it.

24. Make Something With Homegrown Food
Last year we planted some squash and cucumbers because the kids wanted to buy them at a farmer's market. I figured they would die in a few days but the kids kept watering them and they kept growing. They grew enough that we planted them in our yard. Only one of the cucumbers grew big enough that we could have made something with it but we threw it away instead.

25. Go To Canada
.3 I live only a few hours awayfrom it but I've never been to Canada. I've been to Mexico and Germany but not Canada. Just another one of those things I probably won't ever do unless I say I will.

26. Finish My Unfinished Tasks At Home
I am a master of completing 90-95% of a job at home. Whether it's painting a room, building a deck, or remodeling my son's room, I just can't seem to completely finish things. There are always little things that need to be done around the house, but it makes me mad that most of them continue to go undone even though they take less than a day to complete.

27. Read The Bible
Those who know me probably know my thoughts about religion. I do however think it's a bit hypocritical of me to have not read the Bible in forever. I can't remember what age I was when I read it....maybe 10 or so, but I feel like I should read it again now that I'm old enough to hopefully understand it a lot more.

28. Volunteer At A Homeless Shelter
I think this is something everyone should do at least once. I feel bad that I haven't done this or something similar already.

29. Complete A Mud Run
Those just look like a lot of fun. I might consider the Color Run also since it's pretty similar.

30. Bet On The Superbowl Winner Before The Season Starts
I feel like I have a good understanding of football. My Superbowl predictions however are always wrong. It seems like I usually guess the 2 teams that lose in the Divisional Championship games. But anyways, every year I say I'm going to put a bet on the winner before the season starts only to forget about it. It has been a good thing so far considering I have only been right once, the Colts in 2007.

So there it is my 30 things to do before I turn 30. Let me know what you think! And those of you not already 30, I encourage you to make a list also.

ten things i think i think

1. I think I am glad I started reading books again and am actually enjoying it a little. I still don't think I will read unless I have nothing better to do, but it is slowly creeping up the list of things to do when I am bored. In fact it has just surpassed trying to swallow my tongue and trying not to think about polar bears.

2. I think it is interesting how kids come into the world with no biases, no concept of segregation and no thoughts to treat others differently because of their sex, race, wealth, religion, weight, sexual preference, etc. Is it society's fault that this happens? If you took 20 kids that looked like they could pose for a workplace diversity ad and forced them to grow up in an MTV's Real World style environment, would they continue to look like the kids from Captain Planet or would they split up and turn into groups of this, this, and this. What got me thinking about this was a great article I recently read telling a story of a mom who watched her daughter quickly befriend a poor girl with one arm and no shoes. If kids are able to put all things aside, why can't adults?

3. I think I stole this from the same place I stole the title for this post from, but I like it so I'm putting it here anyways. It's part of a commencement speech from Ted Koppel to the University of Massachusetts.

"More than ever before, we live today in a world of instant reaction, constant judgment and corrosive partisanship. Political debate is a wonderful thing; but partisan shrieking is corrosive and destructive. If we are to find solutions to the challenges we face, we have to relearn the virtues of compromise. If we are going to deal intelligently with the problems we confront, we need time to pause, to consider and reflect. But our media, news and social, are intolerant of anything but an instant response ... Rather than using information to illuminate the world, though, we consume it like fuel. The more we burn, the faster we go. The faster we go, the less we see and understand. We slow down only for the accidents along the side of the road; and the biggest accident still lies ahead.

Only, I fear, when that occurs -- only when the combined impact of too many unemployed, too many foreclosures, too much debt, exacerbated by two undeclared and unfunded wars; only when the human and social costs of a crumbling education system and a flawed health care system, leave us wondering where and why we lost our footing as a nation, will we come to realize that WHAT is communicated to us is vastly more important than the medium by which it is conveyed.

... One day, most Americans will point at us in the news media and say: "Why didn't you tell us? Why did you encourage all that bile and venom? Why did you feed us all that trivial crap, when so many terrible things were converging? And no one will be happy with the answer. Least of all, those of us who offer it. "What we gave you," we will say, "is what you wanted."

At this critical juncture in your lives, then, let me urge you -- no, let me implore you to want more. More substance, more real information about important issues, more fairness, more objectivity, more tolerance for views that differ from your own. You have a truly magical array of media at your disposal. Use them well."

4. I think TED talks are great. I found the one below interesting for a lot of reasons, but mostly because it made me rethink my opinions on capital punishment and give more thought to our terrible prison system. The speaker, Bryan Stevenson, describes his views on our current system of punishment and why it needs more attention. He describes our country currently defining the opposite of poverty as justice rather than wealth. The part that struck me the most is when he says that the character of our society will ultimately be judged by how we treat the poor, condemned and incarcerated. I don't know if that is true or not, but it is interesting to me. It is easy to punish someone for a crime without trying to solve the actual problems of why the crime was committed in the first place. The general ignorance that we give to this question of Why? may very well be what defines us.



5. I think I was inspired by someone who was inspired by someone who was probably inspired by someone else. I read a blog post recently about a friend who is approaching 30 and is making a list of 30 things to do before she turns 30. She is doing this based on inspiration from a blog post about someone else that is doing it. So basically what I am saying is that I am going to make my own list of 30 things to do before I turn 30. Inspiration is one of the most contagious things out there. It causes people to do things they wouldn't normally do just because someone else did it and I think that is awesome.

6. Another great TED talk by Peter Diamandis about technology and the advancements and possibilities of our world. I'm sure this guy is making tons of money from books and other crap related to this, but it's hard to argue with his points.

I sometimes wonder about the consequences technology could have on the world, but that is the problem, nobody knows for sure. What are known for sure are the positive results and endless possibilities technology has given us.



7. I think I wish I had listened to Reggie Watts earlier. For those who have never heard of him he is a musician/comedian who spent a lot of time in the Seattle area but now lives in New York. He does the whole impromptu beat box looping song making thing kinda like Beardyman if you have heard of him. The comedy part and complete randomness is what I think sets Watts apart. I like weird stuff, so if you do to then definitely check out Reggie Watts.

8. I think I am getting sick about the stories surrounding the New Orleans Saints bounty scandal. They messed up and they got punished, but still there are daily stories about it. Would it be okay to at least wait until football actually starts 3 months from now to talk about the stupid Saints?

9. I think this article on fox news about the extinction of japanese people might be the single stupidest news story I have ever read/seen. I check out Fox News sometimes to make sure that my opinions aren't being created out of reluctance to seek opinions that differ from my own, but crap like this makes me not want to. Side note: I like how it says "fair & balanced" below the Fox News logo but I only go there because I know that it isn't.

10. I think if there were a pill people could take to ensure a great day I might buy it. I was looking at old pictures from when my kids were in the 1-4 year old range and each photo looked like they were having the best day of their lives.....well except for Alyssa crying because she was scared of Santa. My son had a great day yesterday, which paired with the pictures, got me wishing he had those days more often. The movie Brain Candy was made 16 years ago, yet we still don't have this pill. It's time to quit wasting time trying to make bigger, thinner 3D TV's and making 10G cell phones and start making medicines that trick people into being happy. I don't even care if there are a couple of flipper babies.

Anyone who knows me well knows I'm joking, but it's hard having a child who is so easily frustrated by the things most people don't think twice about.

i'm back

Well I'm back from my week long electronics sabbatical. Honestly I thought it would be a lot more interesting. I guess the "highlight" if you can call it that was my wife getting mad everyday because she couldn't get a hold of me. Maybe it was just because it was such a short time, who knows, but I think last week bothered her a lot more than it did me.

Anyways, here are 3 things I learned:

I need to get my watch fixed - My watch strap broke maybe 2 years ago. I never got it fixed because I honestly never used it. Even when it was on my arm I found myself checking my phone for the time. When I wasn't at home last week, it was frustrating not knowing what time it was.

I was not as bored as I thought I would be - The times I thought I would be bored (sitting at the doctor's office, downtime at work, etc.) were just replaced by other things to keep me from being bored. Instead of surfing the internet, I read a few books. Instead of watching TV, we played card games. The only time I was really bored was when I finished reading my book at work and had nothing else to do. Other than that I found myself surprisingly entertained.

I am going to try and achieve more goals - The day I finished my book I sat around for awhile with nothing to do. Then I started thinking about a list I made in high school which was either 50 or 100 goals, I can't remember which. Anyways I realized that I have not tried to really achieve any goals in a long time, so I made a list of things I want to do. I only came up with 16 things this time, but I decided to put a lot more attention towards it. One of my goals is to weigh less than 200 pounds, even if just for a day. I set a challenge for myself to see if I can lose 20 pounds in the month of June. We'll see how it goes.

I wasn't sure if I would get anything out of avoiding using my phone/computer/other stuff for a week, and in a lot of ways I really didn't. Nonetheless, I'm glad I did it. I am not very spontaneous and I usually tend to over think everything. Maybe doing this one stupid thing will help me to be more spontaneous and just do things for the hell of it. Maybe I will stop needing sufficient reasons for every action I take in life. Maybe my reluctance to try and achieve goals is because I over think everything. Maybe I will stop constantly finding reasons why I shouldn't do things. Or more likely, I'm just overanalyzing the relevance of last week.

going offline

I mentioned in a recent post that I was thinking of going without the internet for a week just to see how much it actually impacts my daily life. I started thinking about it more and decided I am going to expand on it a little.

In addition to not using the internet I will try and refrain from using any other electronic devices. No Ipod, no cell phone, no text messaging, no email, no apps, no watching tv or movies, and no playing video games. I use a computer most of the day at work, so I will restrict my computer usage at work strictly to the jobs I am working on. The only other exception will be emergency phone calls.

I was trying to think of reasons why I shouldn't do this but the only thing I could think of was that it isn't convenient. That seems like a lazy answer. I am not sure what I expect to get out of this and it may not be interesting at all, but how will I know if I don't do it.

My week will start Sunday May 13th. I'll post something after that for those interested in how it went.

ten things i think i think

1. I think this is a nice quote "The illusion of freedom of the press is perhaps more damaging and dangerous than knowing that you are being lied to and that everything you hear is censored." Here is the article it came from.

2. I think it is interesting how Ron Paul has been ignored the past few months. Is it because he doesn't have enough cash to constantly keep him relevant with the media? Is there a reason the media does not want him to win the nomination? Is it because people already know everything about him and there is nothing "newsworthy" left to report? I refuse to believe that it is simply because he is trailing too much in the delegate race. That is no reason to completely disregard the only other nominee left. I'm not saying I would even vote for the guy, but it is just another sad example of why our country is failing. This article and this article shed some light on the poor job the media has done of equally representing the candidates.

3. I think this is another interesting quote, kind of in line with my previous thought.

“Once a government is committed to the principle of silencing the voice of opposition, it has only one way to go, and that is down the path of increasingly repressive measures, until it becomes a source of terror to all its citizens and creates a country where everyone lives in fear.” - Harry S. Truman

4. I think the rest of this post will have no more politics.

5. I think it's funny that at least one person in my office at work still plays the Friday song every Friday.

6. I think I am going to go without the internet for a week. There is a guy that is going a year without the internet, but I am not that dedicated. It shouldn't be that big of a deal, but it will be interesting to see how much I actually rely on the internet for. I know one week isn't long, but I'll just start with next week and see how it goes from there.

7. I think the NBA playoffs suck. 7 game first rounds are ridiculous and not having a team to root for makes it even worse. Not to mention that I don't think I've actually watched a full game in like 3 years. Would the Kings move up here already!

8. I think this is a funny video. At least those stupid voice recognition things are getting better for those of use who can actually be understood.

9. I think Sounders games are better to watch live than the Mariners, Seahawks, or former Sonics for the following reasons:

- You can see everything that is happening on the field no matter where you are sitting.
- It is more kid friendly before, during, and after the game than any of the other sporting events.
- The cost is significantly less.
- The environment is always hostile towards opponents and enthusiastic for the Sounders. I know the Seahawks games louder and crazier, but I have never been to a Sonics or Mariners regular season game that has the overall crowd excitement of a Sounders game. - The players acknowledge the fans, win loss or draw, after every game.

10. I think I hate automatic flushing urinals. I get that it is cleaner and more sanitary, but I hate not knowing exactly it will decide to flush and having to dodge the backsplash. All new products should be tested by me first before they are allowed to be dispersed amongst the general public. Hmm.....now that I think of it, I think I have the wrong job. I wonder how much a product tester gets paid. Perfect job for a pessimist!

bruce irvin?

My world has been pretty boring lately, so there hasn't been a lot on my mind. Still I felt the need to write about something. The most controversial and/or interesting thing that I have thought about lately has been the Seahawks draft, in particular Bruce Irvin. I'll admit, I was just as shocked as most everyone else when they announced the selection. But after taking a further look into why he was selected, I found myself excited about the pick. Regardless of whether Irvin turns out to be a great player or not, I think he was the right choice and here is why.

The biggest argument I have heard about why the Seahawks should not have selected Bruce Irvin is that the hawks reached for him. He supposedly had a 2nd or 3rd round grade. According to who? Mel Kiper? The same Mel Kiper that said JaMarcus Russell will be a top 5 QB within 3 years of being drafted? Just because the "draft experts" say a guy is going to get picked in the 2nd round, common sense will tell you that is not necessarily true. Just ask Courtney Upshaw or Stephen Hill from this years draft. Ask Brady Quinn what he thinks about draft projections. If you're talking about 2nd or 3rd round grades, ask Chris Polk why his "grade" failed to even get him drafted. The draft experts have proven themselves wrong just as often as the teams selecting players. Yet time and time again people base their opinions of the draft on the opinions of these experts.

Based on projections, it was decided that Bruce Irvin would have been available when the Seahawks picked in the 2nd round. Then a few days later it was reported that the Jets were planning on taking Irvin with the very next pick. In addition there were between 3 and 7 teams that would have considered Irvin with their first picks. Considering the run on DE's that happened right after the Seahawks pick, I think it is safe to say that even if the Jets report was false there is still no way that the Seahawks would have been able to get Irvin in the 2nd round.

I think a lot of the people judging the Seahawks pick don't really understand the defensive scheme that the Seahawks run. Nearly all of the experts that were deciding who the Seahawks should draft overlooked the simple concept of which player fits their defense the best. The Seahawks have a pretty unique defense. They run a 4-3, but their strong side DE is Red Bryant. Yes the 6' 4" 333 pound Red Bryant who just signed a big contract extension. The other DE is team sack leader Chris Clemons. Both are starters and there is no way any rookie would have taken either of those spots. One side is a run stuffer, one side is a pass rusher. Everyone knew the Seahawks needed a pass rusher, but more importantly they needed a specific type of pass rusher. Not a run stuffer, their future is set there. They needed a guy that can come in on passing downs and get to the QB, and hopefully eventually take over for Clemons when he starts to decline. Some DE's may have been more complete, but that is not what the Seahawks defense needed. A guy like Quentin Coples realistically had no place on their team. They would have had to completely change their base defense for a rookie. How stupid does that sound?

The biggest need for the Seahawks was a 3rd down pass rusher, a middle linebacker, and maybe a WR or OG. Luke Kuechly was probably the only ILB worth taking that high and he was gone. Dont'a Hightower would have been a possibility. The only other pass rusher I could see that would have fit the Seahawks scheme is Chandler Jones. So should they have taken a WR? They could have stayed at #12 and taken Michael Floyd. But I also think they have receivers capable of putting up some decent numbers this year. I would have loved to see David DeCastro here, but based on how their injury depleted OL excelled at the end of last year, I don't think it was necessary to draft more linemen. I think Melvin Ingram would have been a good pick at OLB/DE. The only problem is that K.J. Wright played well last year and they resigned Leroy Hill. Still, I think Ingram could have challenged for a starting spot and would be able to play all 3 downs.

The success or failure of Bruce Irvin will be compared to guys like Coples, Ingram, and Jones. Regardless of how it turns out, I like the thought behind the pick. They didn't draft a pass rusher last year and could not afford to do it again. They took the guy who they felt fit their team the best and ignored what other people said. I recently read an article about Bill Walsh's NFL draft philosophy. Reading that article just reaffirms my belief that the Seahawks front office knows what they are doing and made the right choice.

Hopefully something more thought invoking than lions trying to eat kids or Kate Upton doing the Cat Daddy happens in the next few days so I have something besides sports to write about.

2012 nfl draft

The NFL draft is one of my favorite things to watch. Whether it's watching the crazy Jets fans boo whoever is drafted, the awkward silence when someone is drafted higher than the "experts" said they should, or the Raiders taking the fastest guy regardless of actual football ability, I enjoy it. Part of the excitement is the fact that so many first round picks are busts. Millions are spent on interviews, scouts, investigating a players history, the nfl combine, overpaid draft experts, physical exams, and tons of other crap, yet the bust rate is still ridiculously high (around 50%) and guys like Arian Foster still manage to go undrafted.

I decided this year that I would make my own mock draft. I will include the picks I think each team will make as well as which player at that same position I think will ultimately have a better career. Anyways, here it goes.

1. Indianapolis Colts - Andrew Luck - QB Stanford
Kinda obvious considering the owner already said they were taking him. Last year was hard to watch but if you are going to suck, you might as well Suck For Luck!
(Should pick - Andrew Luck - QB Stanford)

2. Washington Redskins - Robert Griffin III - QB Baylor
Another obvious pick. They traded to #2 for a reason. While I didn't watch any of Baylor's games last year except their thrashing of UW, judging from that game alone I think Griffin was the 2nd best QB on the field. I know it's stupid to judge from one game, but hey, it's my mock draft.
(Should pick - Ryan Tannehill - QB Texas A&M)

3. Minnesota Vikings - Matt Kalil - OT USC
I think Minnesota is a mess and they don't know what to do. Trade down? Unlikely considering what it cost Washington to move to #2. They need almost every position, but OT usually is a safe pick.
(Should pick - Matt Kalil - OT USC)

4. Cleveland Browns - Trent Richardson - RB Alabama
Cleveland is another team that has been a mess lately. Holmgren isn't doing nearly as well as a GM as he was as a coach. They are picking too high to take another QB, and too high to trade down. I think they reluctantly take Richardson.
(Should pick - David Wilson - RB Virginia Tech)

5. Tampa Bay Buccaneers - Morris Claiborne - CB LSU
Claiborne scored so low on the Wonderlic Test that I took this sample test to see how hard it could really be. My score = 37.5. Claiborne = 4. (No not a misprint). However, after looking at some sample tests I have a hard time seeing how exactly this translates to running and tackling. (Side note, anyone who tries that sample test, do question 9 last. I wasted half of my time on that stupid question before getting the answer and didn't have time to answer 11 and 12 which are both pretty easy ones.)
(Should pick - Morris Claiborne - CB LSU)

6. St. Louis Rams - Justin Blackmon - WR Oklahoma St.
I think the Rams are in a pretty good position at #6. Nobody is going to trade ahead of them to take a WR, and a few teams after them (JAX, CAR, BUF) also need WR's. There are only 2 projected top WR's available so I think they snatch one here. I also think if I were taking one, Blackmon would not be on my list. But hey, the Rams suck for a reason.
(Should pick - Michael Floyd - WR Notre Dame)

7. Jacksonville Jaguars - Stephen Gilmore - CB South Carolina
Jacksonville is boring except for MJD. I have nothing to say about them other than that.
(Should pick - Trumaine Johnson - CB Montana)

8. Miami Dolphins - Ryan Tannehill - QB Texas A&M
The Dolphins might over think this one and take someone else. Tannehill is not a no-brainer pick, but the Dolphins are at least talented enough to think that they won't get a shot at a QB early in next years draft....I think...They have failed at landing anyone lately and they owe it to the fans to take Tannehill even if he ends up being a bum.
(Should pick - Russell Wilson - QB Wisconsin)

9. Carolina Panthers - Michael Floyd - WR Notre Dame
I think Michael Floyd is the best WR in the draft and the only one I would take in the first few rounds.
(Should pick - Alshon Jeffery - WR South Carolina)

10. San Diego Chargers via Buffalo Bills - David DeCastro - G Stanford
My first trade of the draft. There are several teams that would take DeCastro before the Chargers at pick #18 so I think they jump all of them to get him. Buffalo missed out on the WR they wanted in Floyd, so I think they are eager to trade down.
(Should pick - David DeCastro - G Stanford)

11. Kansas City Chiefs - Luke Kuechly - ILB Boston College
Everyone is saying he is the "safest" defensive pick in the draft. It reminds me too much of when the Seahawks took Aaron Curry and that turned out miserable. I don't think Kuechly will be that bad but I hope the it's the Chiefs that waste an early pick on him.
(Should pick - Keenan Robinson - ILB Texas)

12. New York Jets via Seattle Seahawks - Mark Barron - S Alabama
My second projected trade. I think the Jets defense is beginning to crack. Cromartie sucks at pass defense and Barron is the best safety available. They know Dallas will take him at #14 so I think they trade up to get him.
(Should pick - Mark Barron - S Alabama)

13. Arizona Cardinals - Riley Reiff - OT Iowa
Larry Fitzgerald reportedly wants another WR (Michael Floyd) to finally give them a second WR. The only way I think they get him is to trade up to #6 or #7 but I think it would cost them too much, so they take their next biggest need in a tackle.
(Should pick - Bobbie Massie - OT Mississippi)

14. Dallas Cowboys - Jonathan Martin - OT Stanford
Martin did great at Stanford, but the Pac 12 isn't really known for good defensive ends. If anything they are known for bad ones. I still think the Cowboys take Martin, but will regret it.
(Should pick - Mike Adams - OT Ohio St)

15. Philadelphia Eagles - Fletcher Cox - DT Mississippi St
I honestly don't know much about any of the DT's but I do know that the Eagles should be drafting defense with most of their picks. I think they take the top rated DT here.
(Should pick - Jerel Worthy - DT Michigan St)

16. Seattle Seahawks via New York Jets - Melvin Ingram - OLB South Carolina
It seems like there are a lot of DE's and OLB's available in this draft, and Ingram could play either position. With as bad as the hawks offense has been, I think they still go defense with their first pick.
(Should pick - Melvin Ingram - OLB South Carolina)

17. Cincinnati Bengals - Dre Kirkpatrick - CB Alabama
Half way there....this is taking longer than I thought. Cincinnati has 2 picks pretty close together. They need defense and I think they take the last top CB available with their first pick.
(Should pick - Dre Kirkpatrick - CB Alabama)

18. Buffalo Bills via San Diego Chargers - Kendall Wright - WR Baylor
The Bills have to go offense with almost every pick this year. They don't really have a #1 WR but there aren't any left for them. I still think they take a WR with their first pick, but later after trading down.
(Should pick - Greg Childs - WR Arkansas)

19. Chicago Bears - Amini Silatolu - G Midwestern St Cutler gets hit too much. After signing Brandon Marshall, they will be wanting to throw the ball more. Coples would be tempting here, but if they are smart they will take an OL.
(Should pick - Cordy Glenn - OT Georgia)

20. Tennessee Titans - Quentin Coples - DE North Carolina
There are a lot of good DE's in this draft. #20 is really late for taking a DE but I think the fact that there are so many available will cause the position to get taken lower than it probably should. Coples is considered "risky" but he has the most potential. At #20 it is too good to pass up.
(Should pick - Quentin Coples - DE North Carolina)

21. Cincinnati Bengals - Courtney Upshaw - DE Alabama
With their second pick I think the Bengals also go defense. I think it is still too early to consider taking a RB for them.
(Should pick - Chandler Jones - DE Syracuse)

22. Denver Broncos - Dontari Poe - DT Memphis Another trade. Trades are impossible to predict so I'm not even sure why I did. Anyways, The Broncos will be shocked to see Poe still available and trade up to keep him from possibly going to Pittsburgh.
(Should pick - Alameda Ta'Amu - DT Washington)

23. New England Patriots - Dont'a Hightower - ILB Alabama
Last trade I swear. New England seems to trade more than any other team. With 2 first round picks I think they will do it again, this time going up to take another LB. Their defense is pathetic. I could see Janoris Jenkins possibly going to NE, but they might be able to get him later.
(Should pick - Tank Carder - ILB TCU)

24. Pittsburgh Steelers - Kevin Zeitler - G Wisconsin
If the Steelers want to continue to be successful they need Roethlisberger to stay healthy. That means they will be taking OL with at least 2 picks in this draft.
(Should pick - Kevin Zeitler - G Wisconsin)

25. Cleveland Browns - Stephen Hill - WR Georgia Tech
The Browns need a bunch of offensive help. I think they go for the guy who might be the fastest WR in the draft to help out their QB.
(Should pick - Stephen Hill - WR Georgia Tech)

26. Houston Texans - Rueben Randle - WR LSU
The Texans would have loved to get Hill here, but settle for Randle as a compliment to Andre Johnson. I think they will really wish they had gotten Hill though.
(Should pick - Jeff Fuller - WR Texas A&M)

27. Detroit Lions - Coby Fleener - TE Stanford
I think Fleener will be the 4th Stanford player taken in the first round. I think the Lions shock a few people and take Fleener to be their 2nd good TE. If so, look out for Detroit's offense next year. They are already good, Fleener might make them Super Bowl caliber.
(Should pick - Coby Fleener - TE Stanford)

28. Green Bay Packers - Harrison Smith - S Notre Dame
I don't really have a clue who any of these teams will actually draft, but I know Green Bay will draft a great player. They always do. They desperately need defense, particularly pass defense. They always score a ton of points so teams have to throw against them. I think they take a safety to help out that pass defense.
(Should pick - Harrison Smith - S Notre Dame)

29. Baltimore Ravens - Peter Konz - C Wisconsin
The Ravens also are a team that always drafts well. No coincidence that these teams pick at the end of every draft. They need a center and Konz is the best available.
(Should pick - Peter Konz - C Wisconsin)

30. San Francisco 49ers - Michael Brockers - DT LSU
The 49ers defense was great last year. They could use help at WR, but I think they go for best available and take Brockers. They could use another CB but I don't think they go out on a limb for Janoris Jenkins.
(Should pick - Michael Brockers - DT LSU)

31. St. Louis Rams - Cordy Glenn - OT Georgia
I couldn't finish without another New England trade. It would be a shock if Glenn is still available here, and if so the Rams will move up to take him.
(Should pick - Kelechi Osemele - OT Iowa St)

32. New York Giants - Doug Martin - RB Boise St
If Fleener is still available I think they take him here. There are also some LB possibilities, but I think they go for another RB. Jacobs is gone and Bradshaw gets hurt every year. I should know, he is always on my fantasy team. I think they go for a big RB rather than a small quick guy and take Martin.
(Should pick - Terrance Ganaway - RB Baylor)

ten things i think i think

1. I think this is an interesting quote taken from an article about current voting options. "...having just two (political parties to vote from) creates a "with us or against us" mentality, encouraging us to exaggerate our differences and deny our similarities. The whole structure is unnatural in today's world and a recipe for disillusionment." - Nathan Daschle. I wonder how long it will take for politicians to recognize this.

2. I think this is a funny reference to one person making a mistake that affects everyone else. "One guy shits his pants and we all have to wear diapers." - Some Random Guy At Work

3. I think I will make my own mock NFL draft this year. It seems like you could throw darts at names on a board and be just as likely to get a Pro Bowl player as a bust, yet teams spend millions on that crap. Weird.

4. I think this article is pretty interesting. It is a supposed former soldier's opinion of the way wars are depicted in military vs. how they actually are. The video game part isn't so interesting to me, but the way he describes the glorification of military heroes is. While I don't necessarily agree with anything that is written, I think it is an interesting perspective of the military. As someone whom has never been in the military is my perspective the one given to me through movies/tv/media and completely wrong? Guess I'll never know.

5. I think controversial art is pretty cool, particular the art related to social issues. Things happen around the world that go unrecognized by most everyone other than those directly involved. Artists bring attention to these issues through controversy. The funny part though is how the same idiots that are against the art help promote it. If they want to show their anger, the best thing to do would be to stay quiet about it. By voicing your anger (the artists intent) you cause it to gain popularity. But anyways, here are some more interesting examples: Urban Grafitti, Jon McNaughton's political art, or some of the stuff by Czech artist David Cerny.

6. I think the hashtags are weird. I think hashtags on Facebook are weirder....especially since Facebook does not support hashtags.

7. I think there is a big difference between being closed-minded and being opinionated. I am very opinionated. I am not closed-minded. I am always open to new ideas, but if I ask "Why?" it takes more than "because" to satisfy me.

8. I think that new movie Bully looks interesting. However, I would like to see a movie through the eyes of a bully instead of the kids being bullied. I think that would have a more resounding effect. I think most people understand that bullying is messed up and that not enough is done to prevent it. I think people understand what happens sometimes when continued teasing goes ignored. I think people know what kind of people are bullied. But the part I don't think people understand is why people do the bullying in the first place. It is most often argued that the bully craves attention, is trying to impress friends or needs to feel better about themself. I think there is more to it though and I think people could relate better to a movie focused on the actual bullies. I am still glad that this movie was made, even without having viewed it.

9. I think it's almost time to go to the Rodeo Drive-In! Just gotta wait for something worth watching.

10. I think gratitude is the hardest thing to teach kids and I am not doing a very good job of it with my own. The only logical way I can think of to teach this is to stop giving them things. I know that by giving them things they are more frequently becoming entitled to it, but the risk of being a bad parent in the eyes of my children will likely prevent me from ever doing this. I guess it is my job as a parent to fix this kind of stuff, so maybe I should start.